Date or Soul Mate List
A great list of must
have qualities from
Neil Clark Warren's book - Date
or Soul Mate?
Must Have!
TRAITS
1. Chemistry - I must feel deeply in
love with and attracted to my partner.
2. Communicator - I must have someone who is good
at both talking and listening.
3. Sense of Humor - I must have someone who is sharp
and can enjoy the humorous side of life.
4. Verbal Intimacy - I must know that my partner
likes sharing his or her deepest emotional thoughts and desires.
5. Emotionally Healthy - I must have a partner who
is emotionally healthy and able to share a stable life with someone
else.
6. Strong Character - I must have a partner who is
honest and strong enough to do the right thing.
7. Artistic - I must have a partner who has a passion
for music, literature, drama, art, and the finer things in life, either
as a spectator or participant.
8. Kind - I must have a partner who is gentle and
kind.
9. Educated - I must have someone whose educational
achievements match my own.
10. Organized - I must have a partner who values
structure in his or her life.
11. Exciting - I must have someone who isn’t
afraid to take a risk and who sees life as an adventure.
12. Patient - I must have someone who can handle
life’s frustrations or momentary setbacks with a patient, steady
demeanor.
13. Tolerant - I must have a partner who is able
to hear and appreciate divergent viewpoints.
14. Conflict Resolver - I must have a partner who
will work to resolve rather than win arguments or conflicts within our
relationship.
15. Attractive - I must have a partner who is considered
“attractive” by most current standards.
16. Personal Habits - I must have a partner who maintains
high standards of personal hygiene, orderliness, and other personal
habits.
17. Affectionate - I must have someone who is comfortable
giving and receiving affection.
18. Industrious - I must have someone who is willing
to work hard at whatever they do.
19. Energy Level - I must have someone whose energy
level matches my own.
20. Emotionally Generous - I must have a partner who
enjoys people and is generous with his or her compassion, attention,
sympathies, and love.
21. Intellectual - I must have a partner who is bright
and can share my understanding of the world as well as enjoy discussing
important issues.
22. Self-Confident – I must have a partner
who knows and believes in himself or herself throughout life’s
ups and downs.
23. Unassuming - I must have someone who is able
o accept criticism and even admit to being wrong sometimes.
24. Able to Accept Help - I must have a partner who
is willing to accept outside help for personal or relationship issues
that are serious and important.
25. Curious - I must have a partner who is hungry
for new information and knowledge, and who strives to learn as much
as possible.
26. Loyal - I must have someone I can count on to
always be in my orner.
27. Adaptable - I must have a partner who is able
to adapt to life’s surprises.
28. Family Life - I must have a partner who is committed
to marriage, home, and family.
VALUES
29. Shared Interests - I must have someone who is
willing to share my interests and passions.
3O. Style and Appearance - I must have someone who
cares about the way they look and dress and has a sense of personal
style.
31. Shared Politics - I must have someone who has
political beliefs which are the same or -similar to my own.
32. Spirit of Volunteerism - I must have a partner
who shares my willingness to volunteer and support community and/or
social causes.
33. No Children - I must have someone who shares
my desire not to have children.
34. Family - I must have someone who shares my desire
to have or adopt children.
35. Stepchildren - I must have someone who will accept
my children as his or her own.
36. Parenting Style - I must have someone who shares
my views about how to raise children.
37. Parent Care - I must have someone who is willing
to help me take care of my parent, now or when the time comes.
SOCIAL LIVING
38. Staying In - I must have a partner who mainly
enjoys staying in together and having quiet evenings alone or with close
friends.
39. Sociability - I must have a partner who loves
to socialize with lots of different people.
40 Autonomy - I must have a partner who will give
me space to be my own person.
SPIRITUALITY
41. Spirituality - I must have someone with a similar
deep commitment to spirituality and who shares my beliefs.
42. Religious Practice - My partner must be committed
to being an active member of a church, temple, or congregation.
43. Spiritual Acceptance - My partner must accept
and respect my spiritual beliefs, whether he or she shares them or not.
FINANCIAL/CAREER
44. Responsible - My partner must be financially
responsible.
45. Ambitious - I must have a partner who shares
my desire to achieve high financial and/or career goals.
46. Relaxed - I must have a partner who is able to
forget about money and focus on the important parts of life.
SEXUALITY
47. Abstinent - I must have a spouse who has saved
himself or herself sexually for marriage.
48. Traditional - I must have someone who is reserved
and traditional in his or her sexual needs.
49. Sexually Knowledgeable - I must have someone
who is mature and knowledgeable as a potential sexual partner, and is
able to express himself or herself freely.
50. Passionate - I must have someone who is willing
to explore our sexual desires with passion and understanding.
"Can't Stand"
list
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or Soul Mate?
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