My Dating Journal
2005
June
July
August
September
June 2005
Sunday, June 12
12PM - I have decided to cast my fishing net back into the
online dating arena after taking a short break from dating. I am going
fishing and I hope to finally catch the “the big one”! I
obsessed about my essays on my dating profile and changed out my pictures
several times. I even asked my friends to review my profile and pictures.
It is interesting the discrepancy between men and women’s preferences
when it comes to pictures! The men want sexy (show off your best assets)
and the women say avoid being too sexy/slutty (red is a fast color).
After much debate, I finally decided to release my profile into the
wild!! Hitting the button to let everyone see my profile was an act
of undressing and I never felt so naked! So I sit here waiting to see
if anyone will look at my profile. Was not more than five minutes when
I get an instant message (IM) from Marvelloustimes who wants to chat
only he does not live anywhere near me and much older than my desired
dating age! Won’t have such a marvelous time here! I quickly declined
his on-line message citing not geographically desirable. Than about
10 minutes later Doc writes me only he looks more like grandpa being
22 years my senior! Hello do these men need reading glasses?! If Samantha
on Sex in the City could not date over fifty men then neither can I!
All cats don’t look or feel the same the dark! Apparently men
think they are never past their dating prime! An hour and three instant
messages later, I decided it was time for me to log out.
Monday, June 13
Total emails received from men: 3; total instant Messages (IM’s)
received from men: 6
8AM - First thing in the morning checked to see if I got any emails
and hey what you know 3 new messages! First message was quite humorous
as I laughed out loud several times. This cane man realized that I might
ex-communicate him from the dating site since he was well over my desired
age range. He poked fun at his age and even joked that he dropped his
cane and needed help picking it up! You got to love a man with a sense
of humor. Still looking at his photos, he is just too old for me especially
since he is 15 years my senior. He even has a photo posted with Goldie
Hawn! Interesting but I don’t think I can go there!
Next one was finally a guy my own age only what’s up with all
the birds around him in his picture?!! I can’t bear the thought
of dating someone with birds flying all over his house!! Can you imagine
all the bird droppings and feathers flying everywhere?! Revenge of the
birds not!! Next….only next was not looking so good with three
strikes against him! Decided to write to cane man and refer him to my
friend who is like an older sister to me.
Tuesday, June 14
Total emails received: 4 and Total IM’s: 6
9AM - I received an interesting email today from a man who claims to
work for one of the "3-letter" agencies. He claims to thrive
on picking up women in the red light district. He is an online dating
newbie and says he does not have many opportunities to meet women. Awl
poor baby! I am suspicious about his photos being dated since he looks
like Ralph Macchio from the Karate Kid! His photos look a bit fizzy
and one of his pictures has a woman with him which is a real turn off
(a dating sin). Wonder if that is his ex-wife? I decided to send FBI
man an email to investigate a bit further.
Wednesday, June 15
Total emails received: 5 and Total IM’s: 8
I received the following response from FBI man:
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Hi
CG:
Already
using codewords (CG)? Thanks for writing. No need
to be a gentle, I'm tough. Thanks for the comment,
the photos in the camouflage garb are recent (taken
before a work related operation in the Southwest),
the photo of me and my sister is not recent. We have
real good genes in my family and [thanks to my mother's
side] hold our age well. I recently cut my hair shorter
so the grey and silver on my temples is more prominent
now.....other than that....I look just like the photos.
My sister's coming over this weekend....I'll get her
to take a photo of me with my hair shorter (just for
you).
Work
questions are fine....it just depends what area you
tread upon. Here's a quick history....I dropped out
of college in 83 and joined the U.S. Coast Guard....what
can I say, I'm adventurous. Left the Coast Guard after
7 years (I was injured) and became a private investigator.
Was also married and divorced during that time. Decided
to go back to the government and joined the U.S. Border
Patrol. I was stationed in Texas (aka the wild west).
After 4 years with the Border Patrol, I obtained a
position as a Special Agent with U.S. INS Office of
Investigations, (about 8 years ago). We since merged
with U.S. Customs and formed a new agency under the
newly formed U.S. Dept. of Homeland Security. About
two years ago I was promoted to Senior Agent and left
the criminal "side of the house" and went
to the "counterterrorism "side." I'm
presently detailed (on loan) to the FBI and on a team
that works counterterrorism investigations....which
we refer to as "chasing ghosts." That's
what I do. I have two offices...one at the FBI (which
I use as my base) and an office at the MLK Fed Bldg
(downtown). I just gave you a lot to take in....but
you might as well know who you're corresponding with.
I'm
going back to school (part-time) in the Fall. It's
an on-line accelerated Criminal Justice program. I
don't need my degree for work, but I'd like to finish
up.
Well....I
need to get to work. What else would you like to know?....I'm
basically an open book....and what else are you going
to tell me about yourself. Looking forward to your
response.
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Hum I don’t think I have ever met anyone who actually worked
for the FBI. People love to say it as a joke so they don’t have
to talk about their “real” jobs. FBI man rambles on and
on about himself and I like for a man to ask me questions. What ever
happened to being interrogated? I will have to think about how I would
like to proceed just not too anxious to write him back as he seems too
only want to talk about himself and well I am not his therapist. I am
not getting paid to listen!
Thursday, June 15
Total emails: 7; Total IM’s: 8
Cane man wrote back and said that he is looking for someone younger
than my friend who he says is just not his type. Why is it that men
in their thirties are looking for women in their twenties and men in
their fifties are looking for women in their thirties? I decided to
write him back only he blocked my email!! Whatever dude!!
Okay now I have seen it all. The following is the creepiest email I
have ever received:
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Hello
sweet lady,
You
have the most wonderful profile in the history of
profiles!!! Such class and style and even humor...and
you are absolutely adorable. I just had to write to
you. Please don't be discouraged by my age. I look
and act 20 years younger than my age...actually, you
might be a little old for me. Hey, I'm just kidding!
Now that I have your attention, kindly allow me to
tell you a few things about myself. Better yet, let
me tell you what some ladies have recently said about
me: "You look like 28 years old, like how do
you do it? Like, ohmygosh, your hair is so thick and
wavy...a lucky woman should have hair like yours.
You must work out with such an awesome physique. You
are the funniest guy ever and such a gentleman. You
have the softest hands ever on a guy. Wow, that was
the best massage I've ever had in my life." Alright,
guess I can be a little picky at times, too. But,
like the song goes, "I still haven't found what
I'm looking for." But enough about me (FINALLY).
I
would like to learn much more about you. What thoughts
exist behind the warm and lovely smile? What are some
of your finest qualities? Don't be modest, but don't
make me blush, either...well, maybe a little bit.
What qualities in a man are most important to you?
Are you as sweet as you seem or am I just dreaming?
How long have you lived on your side of town? I just
started working in your area 6 months ago and took
a 10-week Spanish course so I could communicate with
the majority of the population.
Have
you been pleased with the gentlemen you've met so
far on this dating site? I have been doing the online
dating thing for a year and have met some terrific
ladies and some who were, well...a little crazy. A
couple women had more baggage than a Samsonite factory,
but I did help them through some difficult times in
their lives. Please tell me you are NORMAL. Actually,
you seem most extraordinary and that is why I am writing
to a sweetheart like you...and anxiously waiting for
your sweet reply.
Hugs
from a wavy hair freak!!
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Oh my gosh where to even start with this email?!! You will run into
some interesting characters on the internet and this one tops the creepy
list. I guess nerds as well as really weird men use the internet as
their tool to meet women. Be warned!! You really need to screen as much
as possible. I know there have got to be some decent men out there and
I intend to find them!! I did not respond to this email because I was
just too scared and freaked out!
Friday, June 17
Total emails: 8; Total IM’s: 9
FBI man has written me several times and I feel like a wanted woman
which sometimes can be a bad thing! He appears desperate by saying are
you still there and have I scared you off?!! Another dating sin - do
not come across too desperate or too eager! Something about him appears
a bit off so I decided to keep on stepping!
Sunday, June 19
Total emails: 9; Total IM’s: 11
7PM - Went over to a smug married pregnant friend’s house for
dinner. After dinner she wanted me to log into my dating web sites.
Hum I wonder why the grass always appears to be greener! I want to be
in her married bless shoes and she is envious of my exciting single
life of on-line dating! Go figure!
Hum now have reached the total ick factor with this email. I am sitting
there totally stunned unsure how to react and my friend starts laughing!
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Would
you date a man shorter than you?
You
are very pretty!
I
was thinking you might need a Tuneup date; my assistant
Ted Grad is 4ft10in tall-- he would take you to dinner.
Then you and I would some other night, go to Dinner
and Dancing
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Gee I think the best response in this case is no reply!! NEXT
PLEASE!!!
While I was showing my friend the on-line dating ropes, I get an IM.
Oh boy (insert some sarcasm)!! She is too overly excited about it…….what
do we do we do she squeals in excitement!! He seemed harmless enough
only he did not have any pictures. I decided to write no picture boy
mainly so my friend could see how it was done for instant messaging.
I told him to send his pictures to my email account as I never write
anyone without pictures - it is an online dating commandment! We proceed
to look at all the profiles of eligible men figuring out which ones
I bookmarked for future reference.
Monday, June 20
Total emails: 10; Total IM’s: 13; Outside emails: 1
9AM - No picture boy has sent me his pictures just like he promised.
Good boy!! He is not too bad looking although a bit dorkey since he
is waving at me in one of the photos! Looks like he might have taken
that picture last night. Second picture is a group shot of him running
a road race only hard to make him out in the crowd of running people.
Wonder why he would send it to me? Trying to show off his athletic prowess?!
I sent him a cute little response back.
8PM - Got an email from a guy friend who is a bit to nerdy for me to
date. We just don’t connect and there is no chemistry. Sadly he
is an oasis in the sea of much older men who are writing to me lately.
I do give him credit for not beating around the bush and asking me out
on a date. He has got some balls and that means something in my book!
Men should take charge and ask women out if they are interested instead
of beating around the bush.
9PM - I was thinking of how to turn down nerd friend in a nice way
when I got an IM this time from someone in another state whose profile
was not too bad. Decided to go ahead and give him permission to write
me thinking I will need to tell him that I am not willing re-locate.
I had my first real connection with out of state guy. I found myself
laughing out loud. He wanted to know my real name only I kept it a secret.
Don’t men love a good mystery?! He also wanted to call me but
I would not give him my number. I was afraid I would be setting myself
up for failure with the long distance. He gave me his number but I did
not call him. He told me that he was going to hot list me. Ooh does
that mean that we are going steady?!
While all this was going on, I missed an IM from concertpromotor. Things
are really hopping tonight!! I just can’t keep up!! If you want
a little action to increase your numbers than make sure your “I’m
online” light is showing. Hey boys - over here is a live one for
you!! It appears to be either feast or famine when it comes to my dating
life! Concertpromotor wants to challenge me to a game of galaga. Please…..no
competition! We started emailing he wanted me to name my price and I
was thinking some U2 concert tickets would not be so bad. I would love
to date someone who shares my love of music and get me some good music
connections to support my habit! I think that men should come with some
type of dating perk to make them worth my trouble!
Tuesday, June 21
Total emails: 10; Total IM’s: 14; Outside emails: 1
8PM - How is it that someone you just met can become important? I logged
on and saw out of state connection was on line so I am waiting for him
to IM me. Feeling a bit obsessed. Why don’t you see me?!! He is
not writing to me and I want him to initiate the first IM. A girl has
got to have some rules here. I see that he has hot listed me just like
he promised. 
9PM - Logged on later and boom not in for five minutes out of state
connection IM’s me hi. How was your day? Big sigh of relief okay
I need to get a grip! We start up our fun and games. He finally guessed
my real name after lots of hints. He says he really wants to talk to
me on the phone so he can hear my voice. He also wants me to check out
air fare to come and see him. We shall see!
Wednesday, June 22
Total emails: 10 Total IM’s: 16
9AM - I found myself daydreaming about a romantic trip to see out of
state connection. How he would show up at the airport with roses. He
would show me the sights of his fine city and we would stay up all night
talking, laughing and kissing. I would feel totally taken care of and
would not want for anything. Hum very nice fantasy only the reality
might not be as sweet! We might have no chemistry. You can never tell
about that elusive animal…..chemistry! Then I start to think why
he isn’t the one coming here to see me? He wrote to me than he
should be the man and come to me!! Come to me baby!!
9PM - Logged on and there was out of state connection. I sent him an
IM…..you seem to be on here all the time. I am waiting for you
is his response. Ah such the charmer and I fall for it every time. Funny
he should ask me what I like about him and I did not want to tell him.
I was surprised when he guesses his charm. Seems like he gets me only
I keep reminding myself that he does not live here.
I received an email from a guy who had a decent profile who apparently
loved my quote that laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
Decided to write him and share more insightful quotes.
Thursday, June 23
Total emails: 13 Total IM’s: 16
8AM - Well it appears that decent profile apparently has a thing for
Olivia Newton John. I think he must the only straight guy who went to
see her in concert recently. Boy he writes long emails about himself.
Apparently runs a travel agency which specializes in group trips mostly
overseas. Hum could mean more travel for me should something develop
(dating perk)!
2PM - Got an email from an eclectic guy who claims to be a good mix
between athletic, artistic and intelligence (lawyer). He has an interesting
profile and I decided to send him a reply.
7PM – Logged in to check the emails and saw this one:
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Hi Sweet
Baby,
So, how do
I get to meet a Princess like you?
I would love
to wine and dine you, then go out to dance the night
away.
So, let's
talk sometime.
Sincerely,
J
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Alright would not be such a bad thing if he was not so old!! No thanks
sweet baby!!
9PM - More late night IM’s with out of state connection. IMing
with him is starting to become a habit. I finally decided to give him
my phone number so I could hear his voice. Wonder what it will sound
like? Will we connect on the phone like we do on emails? To be continued….
Friday, June 24
Total emails: 14 Total IM’s: 16
9AM - Got a reply back from eclectic guy. Interesting that he is giving
me multiple choice getting to know you questions like beach or mountains,
owl or lark, romance or comedy. Now I must come back with some good
ones of my own hum I will try innie or outtie, lace or silk, coffee
or tea.
Sunday, June 26
Total emails: 14 Total IM’s: 17
9PM - Got several voice messages over the weekend from out of state
connection! I was really jazzed to finally hear his voice. We got the
chance to talk tonight for the first time. It was nice to finally move
to the next dating level - voice communication! He is definitely someone
I would like to keep in touch. It’s a shame we live so far away
and we both appear to be very comfortable with our respective cities.
Monday, June 27
Total emails: 16 Total IM’s: 17
9AM - Olivia Newton John lover is leaving Friday night to escort his
company’s annual summer adventure trip to Costa Rica for the next
two weeks. He asks me out for Thursday night and since he will be gone
for two weeks, I decided to go ahead and meet him. So much can happen
in two weeks! I could be married! You never know?!
I also received another email from eclectic guy – we seem to
be on a roll with our daily questions and he says he looks forward to
answering them every morning with his first cup of coffee. I have to
say I can’t wait to see what questions will be next! Now looking
at past loves, best online dating experiences, and turns ons and turn
offs.
Tuesday, June 28
Total emails: 17 Total IM’s: 17
9AM - Another email from eclectic guy email with more questions which
are getting more interesting and intense. Our quizzes are becoming a
daily habit. Republican or democratic, pro-life or pro-choice, for or
against gun control.
Thursday, June 30
Total emails: 18 Total IM’s: 19
7PM - Agreed to meet Olivia Newton John lover at a coffee house. Getting
feet wet with someone who appears to be a nice guy. Good to meet at
a coffee house during the week and I know I will only have an hour and
half for this meeting. If it is bad at least I won’t have to endure
too long. Why am I so nervious? What is it about meeting someone off
the internet that gets me so tense? I wondering things like will he
resemble his picture, will the conversation flow and will he like me.
On-line dating is so much like going on a blind date. To me the anticipation
is the most stressful part.
10PM - Okay longest hour and half of my life. Why did I get so nervious
earlier?!! I made it to the coffee house before Olivia Newton John lover
and decided to go outside. This short timid guy opened the door and
would not get out of my way so I said go ahead and come in and I went
outside to wait. Sad for me about a couple of minutes later he comes
out side asking if I was CG. Ever felt like you wanted to run?!! He
did not resemble his picture at all. I thought I would make the most
of it and went inside to order our drinks only I think I needed something
with some alcohol. He spent time talking to the cashier and it was not
hard to figure out that this guy absolutely did not go out on very many
dates! We got our drinks and sat down at one of the tables. I thought
okay I will give him a chance. He liked to speak and emphasize using
hand gestures and I could tell once again that he was nervious because
his hands were shaking. Felt sorry for him and tired to make him feel
comfortable. I listened most of the evening hearing about his jobs,
team trivia, and his single outdoor clubs. Not too much talk time for
CG nor many questions thrown my way. My eyes were glazing over and he
did not even notice. Why is his hand continuing to shake?! Is it a nervious
tick and what’s with the strange laugh?! Finally I said I think
that they are starting to close up making him tell me the time ten o-clock!!
Yea!! I got up grabbed my cup and headed for the door. He walked to
my car and then things did move so swiftly. He stammered do you like
John Mellencamp and I said he is okay. He said that he has tickets to
his concert and would I like to go. Darn why didn’t I say I did
not like him!! So I said I am not really a fan and I can’t go.
Phew accident avoided! I wished him well on his trip only now he said
can I call you I would like to see you. I felt pressed I said okay.
I will just deal when he returns making sure to program my cell phone
so I know when he is calling. I will be honest and tell him I met someone
anyone. So sad that he cannot even tell that there was no connection
oh well dating can sometimes be such a lonely process.
10:30 - Decided to call out of state connection because I need to end
my day on a positive note! Probably not advisable but we talked about
my date but hey I am open with him (no secrets). Then he joked that
we are now on our date!
Continue on to July
2005
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